joy

womb

paper, eggshell pieces, work in progress



Happy new year, everyone! I didn't mean to be away so long...thank you to those who are still checking up on me. You guys are plain awesome :).

Sometimes i wish i had started this blog anonymously so i can feel more free to share whatever is on my mind. There is something i've been wanting the whole world to know but waiting for it to feel more real and to be showing more...I'm going to have a baby, you guys! AND so is my sister!! we are due within a week from one another. what are the chances of that?? Our babies will be like twin cousins. double joy yeah! :)). One of the happiest moments of my life when i found out.

The first three months have passed by sooo slowly. Aside from making it to work during the day, i was pretty much useless the rest of time. Just ate and laid around like a lazy princess, occasionally yelling at John for something or another. heh. poor guy. That's what guys get for not being the one to get pregnant. I don't know how my mom managed to go through all three times with us when she was throwing up constantly. she couldn't even drink water without puking. Man i only threw up once every week or two, and that was bad enough for me to think I am definitely not going through this again...

oh But then my stomach got hard, the nausea went away and i'm feeling this crazy little lump protruding at the lower ab out of nowhere. (Beginning of second trimester.) It was such a creepy feeling. like some alien thing inside me. Doctor said it was baby's leg or foot. It's strange but i found myself falling in love with that leg thing.

And now the days and weeks are going by way too fast. I can barely believe that it's only 3 more months to go! I'm so annoyed i didn't get a chance to take a picture of my belly a few weeks ago when it was like a little watermelon. Now it is a lot rounder and not as cute anymore.

Back in college, one of the themes i was kind of obsessed in exploring was the pregnant body. Made some prints and sculptures of it. But now that i'm actually in this body, i have barely documented anything of it. Hopefully, in the next couple of months, i'll have something more to show...

eggshell spoons

paper, wire, eggshells, works in progress



Something i've been working on these past couple of weeks.



i want to make wings out of you.



John thinks these look like sperms.



Thinking of breath, letting go, keeping steady.

happy mess

Gosh where to begin...much has happened these past few months. My little uncle's baby was just born a couple of weeks ago. She is the sweetest thing, so tiny and precious in my arms. She also got these oddly long but very cute finger toes. I can't wait to see you again, little Tienna!

What else? Ba is not grumpy with me anymore, happy that John is officially family now. The other day Ting and Francis bonded over being the black sheep of the family. Ma and me able to talk things out no matter what. Sadly, not always the case with some friends though...

But oh yay! i got to meet Marjojo (Marion Michell) for the very first time in person when John and i took a trip to London this past September. So lucky in this lifetime i can get to know and be friends with my favorite artist in the world. Speaking of world, I want the whole world to know that Tate Modern Museum following our visit to Marion Michell's studio was such a disappointment. There was nothing i could remember that was remotely comparable to Marjojo's work. Seriously.

Coming back from the experience in London, i feel transformed, aware of myself changing and growing as a person, and in particularly as an artist. It's a feeling that makes you breathe deeper, stand taller, and unafraid to seek what you want. Thank you, David & Erica, for being there so we could make this trip.


Some studio updates: completed a new series of spoons, making progress with a couple of paintings, still wrapping those broken pieces of eggshell, and dipping all sorts of things in hot beeswax.

I am really loving how the dried fruits and leaves turned out after being covered in waxed. They seemed better protected now from the elements of decaying without being changed too much at all.


art art art

unbroken

wrapped eggshells




above: my two favorites so far



I am so enjoying wrapping these. I think the pictures do not do them justice. You have to hold them in your hands and see. I showed one of two attached together to May and she just said they look like balls. John didn't get how awesome they are either. oh well. i appreciate you, dear eggyeggs.

These past couple of months had been really slow in studio. blah blah days. Some heartache here and there too but nothing a good heart-to-heart cry can't soothe. Oh and i am learning to garden! A day out in the yard with my parents beats all the horticulture lectures i was taking. So happy to see that the tomato plants my dad brought over are thriving. They were so wilty-looking when i first planted them. I didn't think they were going to make it but next day i checked they perked up like the sunshine :).

Not too long ago, i dreamt of K again. It was so good to see him, even if it is just in dreams.

My worktable right now is scattered with broken halves and pieces of eggshells. i sure eat a lot of eggs. I'm so excited. So many possibilities to make them whole again! Finally, ideas are brimming...

late beginnings

Early last September, dear wonderful Barbara gave me a dozen eggs fresh from her chickens at home. Sam I Am lays the green eggs. I love all of them so and tried to save the eggshells. Their colors and shapes are so pretty to look at, even the broken ones...





I tried wrapping one of the eggshells but it did not turn out right at all. Felt like i was suffocating it. They are beautiful naked as is, aren't they?

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Today i meet again the guy who reminds me of K. It's been years. Did not recognize him at first but his voice sounded familiar, only louder than what i remembered. He looked changed and not so much like K anymore.

It was good to be home for the holidays and be with the family even though i kept telling people how exhausting it was. My cousins are more and more heroic to me. I wish for more time together with them and my sisters. Soygu looking younger with Sharrlyn and my parents have stopped aging. Called home after driving back late Friday night to let them know we've arrived safely, and i could hear the noise and chatter in the background. Next morning, i woke up thinking of everyone and feeling so lonely. I especially miss my sisters and cousins. Don't want them to ever grow old.